It so rarely happens

Mom guilt and something more.  It happened today.  It snuck up out of nowhere and hit me.  Divorce remorse.  It had nothing to do with the person I was married to.  It was about a friendship that is no longer, a person that was present in my college and post college life.  I was in her wedding, she was in mine.  I should have said hello but I choked.  I was already feeling Mom guilt for missing one son's sporting event because I was at the others, racing to hopefully see at least five minutes of it.   There was no time for a hello to someone I haven't spoken to in many years.  What was worse was missing out on the second sporting event.  I got to say hi to my son and hear how it went.  None the less my choice has me upset.  Does the one that didn't get me feel like I chose the other over him?  That is an incredibly uncomfortable thought.  I wanted to cry to you because you always make me feel better.  But it was not the time for tears.  What a comfort it was just being in your presence.  You and your wonderful Dad.  It is amazing how loved ones work magic on your heart without them even knowing your heart needed mending.

Cousin Week, what fun it was!

I should have blogged everyday to capture it all.  What I can recall is that every day the bonds grew and morphed.  Friendly hugs became natural cuddling which warmed my heart.  Them taking sides, Dallas and Rocco, Mays and Luca.  The conflict resolution, the hilarious conversations in the car, the thoughtful responses to my "educational moments" at dinner when we covered each persons high, low and compliment to someone at the table, and the five things learned this week together.  The hilarious faces and comments from Rocco as I had them do their art project - the collage of photos plus a quote, plus a drawing.

Memorable phrases:
Luca: My mom doesn't have a favorite color, she just dresses fashionable.
Rocco: (while playing Mario and winning...) I came in like a wrecking ball!!
Noni: I bet I can pick up the most legos (a commendable effort to get them to pitch in and clean up legos which only resulted in them expressing looks of, ...Yes you can Noni, you go girl.)
Rocco: Noni let's have our special cuddle time until Tracy gets here.

Meeting Memphis

And some other Chico fun with the fam!  Always a good time together.

 Check out Uncle Rick (AKA Babo) and how cute is Mays and Uncle Mike helping Oliver try too.

 There he is!! Memphis Cook we love you.  You too Auntie Birdie and Sara.

It was an overdue change

It's retired.  A great memory and a super cute photo. Look at those little peanuts.  Oh my goodness, so dang cute!

Dallas Texas

Our summer trip was to Dallas, TX this year.  What fun we had.  Highlights were the pool at the Omni, touring the Cowboys Stadium, visiting the Stockyards in Fort Worth, seeing Brian and Richelle and their two dogs in Georgetown.  We collectively decided we are definitely going back.

Bible Study (Kathy, Kristin, Paula and Me)

I read a short story recently in my Mom's group at church and it struck a chord that caused me to appreciate what we have more than I normally do - which is quite a lot!

It spoke of a woman and her 'people,' started as a cooking club and metamorphosed into an incredible connection between those she spent time with, quality time that is.  Working though kid dilemmas, birthday parties, job changes, cocktail laughter, losses in life, achievements in life, challenges in life, new pets, changes in pets, travel, laughter, goals, life's struggles, did I mention cocktails? and coffee. Just like us.  Ok, it is us.

A little inspiration goes a long way and the story really did hit home with me and my deep appreciation, love and gratitude of the three of you.  It is seeing your faces on a regular basis that keeps my chin up and fills my bucket.  Our threads of conversation keep me smiling throughout the day, our times together are one of the few times I truly live in the present moment without a thought of what may be coming across my phone, just simply soaking in the fun of us - the hilarious phrases, the eye rolls, the sarcasm and chiding, the connecting, and the solving (ok, lamenting) of the world's problems.  Ok again, maybe just our world's problems.

I love that I am as at home in your kitchens as you are in mine, that we are like a concoction of flavors and ingredients, not from the same places, nor from the same backgrounds and with varying beliefs on how to do life yet simmer us for a good long time and we are an amazing dish, full of complimentary flavors and spunk. To quote the story - so lovely and unexpected that you're still thinking about them the next day.  That's my girls!  My Bible Study.

It was too hard to resist so I had to post!

I came across this blog and couldn't resist looking back at all the posts and photos and then I thought well why not,  I'll post again.  Twain Harte has a great little private beach and lake and boy do the kids love it.  So does Uncle Troy!

After the lake we played a solid 18 at the Twain Harte Mini Golf.  It was a four way tie (wink!).

And as it turns out the boys LOVE to fish.  Thanks Uncle Troy for being a superstar Uncle the whole weekend, lets do it again soon!!

Oh Christmas Tree!

The idea...we walk down two blocks to the local neighborhood Christmas tree lot, carry the tree home, decorate and celebrate. It was close.

The boys, me and Buster bundled up and headed out into the cool crisp evening. Mays chattered the whole way about the merits of the lot we were going to - the cool red barn, the pumpkins they sell for Halloween, the strawberries they sell in the summer, the twinkling lights and the closeness to our home.

The first glitch...Big sign: no credit cards accepted but we do take personal checks (what?! who does this anymore?)

The owner says they are closing up for the night but he'll wait for us. So we run home as fast as Buster's legs could go, Buster now being the slowest in the pack at a ripe age of 69. I grab the checkbook, Dallas determines we should leave Buster and we are off. Again.

It's an easy choice, there are $239 trees (OMG! Who does that?!), there are the pricey and questionable looking Spiney stick looking trees and there's my favorite section (excuse me, where are the least expensive trees located?). There were 7 to choose from, three over 5 feet tall. We wanted/needed tall and skinny, Dallas spotted it and Mays agreed and it was swept up by the cutters and I was swept inside to pay.

With cheap watering tray and wood stand nailed on we were ready to head home. When it was discovered that me and the twins were planning to carry it home the two cutters were quickly assigned to the task. So there we went, walking down the street with our tree - so fun!! Not quite as fun as if we were carrying it but realistically much easier.

Home! let the decorations begin. Shoot! Not nearly enough lights - a mad dash to two stores before success.

Home again! Lights, snow, ornaments. My favorites - the stars we made out of toilet paper tubes. They look so pretty on the tree.

An evening of running around, making ornaments, decorating the tree, and cramming in some quickly made dinner comes to an exhausting end. The boys are well asleep, I'm cleaning up the hurricane that hit the house.

Second glitch. Cleaning up the needles I discover the water container the tree guy said I had to have leaks. Well, no duh right? They put a nail through it into the tree stump. Why in the world do they think this is a good idea? I carefully move the tree, pull out the towel (I was somewhat prepared), soak up the water, which thankfully I'd only put 2 cups in so far. New towel, dried carpet, tree back in place.

Oh but far from looking like it did originally. It's like the leaning tower of Pisa. I can hardly believe it hadn't toppled over on me. Towel wedging, careful nudging and jiggling and somehow success.

Love it!! It's going to be dry very soon but it smells and looks great now. If it starts to turn brown I figure I'll spray snow all over it and have a frosted tree. Now I just have to make the tree skirt.

Our Artists

We decided the townhouse could use some art on the walls, so the boys and I started in without much of a plan. Round 1 was a mix of brushes and hands.

Round 2 was crackling. I forgot to photograph it. Since we had such great texture from Round 1, I thought it'd be neat to make it look more like wood. Crackling achieved that. Round 3 was spray painting of some of our favorite beach words in Italian - Sara (and the Tofanelli clan) would be proud. It looks amazing if I do say so myself. Tonight, after finishing at 9:15pm we laid on the stairs and enjoyed it. The boys are eager for the next project, I said they could each do their own. They loved the techniques so "momma is going to help with the crackle." And Dallas is going to do stencils and patterns of hearts. Are we surprised?

OK it's been awhile!

Back on my feet and having fun again after a long absence from being sick (darn colon!) This is us at the San Jose Giants game this weekend with their buddy Connor - we met through church and then pre-school.